"Why Lassie Hates Family Reunions"

Films: The Killer Shrews (1959), Return of the Killer Shrews (2011)

Alias: None

Type: Man-Made

Location: Forest

Height/Weight: The size of wolves.

Affiliation: Neutral

Summary: When you don't have any lab rats to use for your well-intended (yet unorthodox) experiments, there's no need to be picky. You can use any rodent you want, like shrews. Just make sure they don't end up growing into carnivorous monsters bent on eating everything.

History: Some scientist was doing experiments on shrews on an isolated island in the hopes of discovering a way to reduce human size so that world hunger doesn't become a problem anymore. He clearly was going for the "could, not should" approach, as his bonkers idea only ended up mutating the shrews into giants, constantly growing and breeding with each other. Escape from them seemed hopeless, and it only got more complicated when a crew of men delivering supplies showed up. See Final Fate for how well it turned out for them. Anyhow, a tad more than half a century later, history would repeat itself, as a bunch of complete twats, alongside the reluctant old captain Thorne Sherman from the last trip, decided that this island would be the perfect place for their micro-budget nature TV show. The shrews, looking more hideous than ever, wasted no time in trying to kill them all. But things were different this time. That captains rival, Jerry Farrell, had survived his ordeal with the shrews, and had been able to train and tame them into becoming his own personal attack dogs by mutating the elder shrews and controlling them with the help of a special flute. His sole intent: kill Thorne for getting the happier ending last time.

Notable Kills: Nothing much, though they have a habit of swarming their prey and ripping it limb from limb off-screen.

Final Fate: The crew and the doctor manage to escape the island by travelling in large steel cans to get to the docks. After departing, the shrews are left on their island to wait for the next batch of prey. And when that was said and done, Jerry, having failed to bury the hatchet with Thorne, is left to starve alongside his shrew companions.

Powers/Abilities: Aside from pack mentality and speed, the shrews have an incredibly poisonous bite that can kill a man in minutes.

Weakness: Anything conventional, though they seem to really hate having to cross bodies of water.

Scariness Factor: 3-The fact that they're really dogs draped in rugs notwithstanding, the shrews are quite menacing with their running speed and rather mangy close-ups. Quite a few promo materials took advantage of this. The shrews from the sequel on the other hand rate as a 2, as their CGI is remarkably bad with half-assed puppets to boot. Then again, the filmmakers were just having fun being cheap this time.

Trivia: -The only poisonous mammals are Shrews, Slow Lorises, and Platypi.

-The dogs playing the Giant Shrews were Coonhounds.


Image Gallery


The screams can still be heard, though.

A blue tail? Uh...

Let's hope that scientist gets his lisence revoked for this.

They're like the corgies next door, only more voracious.

Finally! Accuracy! Now, please don't tear my throat out.

Accept this scene with a pinch of salt.
Enjoy your nightmares, kids.

Not a shrew, not a dog, but a mouse, this time.

And with that, the battle is already over.

The last meal of the shrews becomes just a memory.



There is no logic here. At all.

Okay, now it's just ridiculous!

They're breeding in the walls, man!


Oh, and they should be DEAD. Remember?
I have no idea how this got into here.

Oh, yeah. There was a color version. The things we do with our time...

At least they aren't immortal.

To...tame...them...ARE YOU HIGH?!

Time has not been kind to these creatures. At all.

On second thought, let's go with the dog-like design.


Trailer(s)